This is why it is never a good idea to kill a goat you haven’t seen before….if only it would have turned into Dick Cheney instead…
cd
LAGOS, Nigeria – A Nigerian murder suspect accused of killing his brother with an axe told police investigators he actually attacked a goat, which was only later magically transformed into his sibling’s corpse, officials said Thursday.
The man, whose name wasn’t released, offered police his explanation after his arrest on Tuesday in the death of his brother the previous day at Isseluku village in southern Nigeria.
“He said that the goats were on his farm and he tried to chase them away. When one wouldn’t move, he attacked it with an axe. He said it then turned into his brother,” Police Commissioner Udom Ekpoudom told the Associated Press.
Murder suspects in Nigeria, where many people believe in black magic, sometimes claim spirits tricked them into killing. In 2001, eight people were burned to death after one person in their group was accused of making a bystander’s penis magically disappear.
A crypto startup called Petshitter — a platform to turn dog waste into crypto, pay people to collect it, and solve a real problem no one in tech has touched. A ridiculous ticket to $3 million in VC funding, a military-grade hazing boot camp, and a seat at the table of the most corrupt, brilliant, and self-congratulatory ecosystem in human history.

CD Damitio writes at indignified.substack.com — essays on utopias, dystopias, and the spaces between. Free to read. No algorithm, no sponsored content. His books can be found on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/stores/CD-Damitio/author/B001JP7NWA
CD Damitio writes INDIGNIFIED — utopias and dystopias explored. Free to read.


























