Sarge
AT-TEN-TION!! First of all let me tell you that there ain’t no place that serves chow like my beloved Marine Corps. When you make 15,000 servings of macaroni and cheese, you really get it down. Back in my drill instructor days I was never easy on my recruits and I’m not gonna be easy on any of these slacker restaurants either. Tell ‘em Sarge is coming.
For my first inspection, I chose Haggen. I expected the worst, grocery stores are no place for a restaurant. I stepped into the chow line at the Asian foods. The other customers were standing further apart than they needed to be. There’s no reason to make people stand in the aisle, so I ordered them to close the gap. One old woman tried to disobey, but 15 pushups convinced her that “elbows to bellybuttons” was the better alternative. The personnel behind the counter were friendly and efficient. I noted it in my report to the editor. I ordered the orange chicken with white rice and pot stickers. On an impulse I picked up some sushi before passing through the pay station. I doubted it would be good. I asked the clerk if she liked working there. To my surprise, she smiled and said, oh, it’s great, I’m really glad I work here. Haggen runs a tight ship. Everything was spick and span, so it surprised me when the employees were not suffering from low morale. I sat in an uncomfortable cafeteria style booth. It wasn’t as comfortable as the NCO club. I summoned my willpower and tasted the horrible stuff. It was as bad as what passes for Chinese Food in Beijing…and the Sushi, it was the worst I’ve had since leaving Japan. I finished it, but dreamt of chipped beef on white toast. I left impressed none the less. They must treat they’re employees right. And the employees obviously care how the company appears to the public. They run a tight ship.
inspection scores
hygiene….10 (very clean, well managed)
efficiency….10 (average wait from entrance to eating 4.3 minutes)
consistency…10 (the food is always the same..exactly)
taste…6 (10 being as good as Marine Chowhalls)
authenticity….8 (as authentic as any I’ve had in the USA)
staff…10 (treat the troops right and they’ll love you)
That’s all for this week. Semper Fi. DIS-MISSED.
I called most of this chaos years ago. America is still unraveling — and the next chapters are already written.
If you want to understand what’s really coming (and why), read Not My America: A Stranger in a Strange Land. Available on Amazon.
CD Damitio writes at indignified.substack.com — essays on utopias, dystopias, and the spaces between. Free to read. No algorithm, no sponsored content. His books can be found on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/stores/CD-Damitio/author/B001JP7NWA
CD Damitio writes INDIGNIFIED — utopias and dystopias explored. Free to read.
