There may have never been a simpler religious philosophy than Baldism.
Don’t be a dick.
It’s really that simple. Baldism isn’t prescriptive. That’s the only commandment. If you want more guidance, you can find it in the suggestions or the community, but essentially it can all be boiled down to the one commandment. “Don’t be a dick.”
While I’m the person who ‘revealed’ Baldism, I didn’t invent it. It was already there. I’m not the boss or the Grand Pooba of Baldism. I’m just a dude that put it all together in a cohesive form. These ideas aren’t new, they are as old as humanity itself. In fact, Baldism was designed to not have a figure head or boss – because frankly, a headless snake isn’t a snake so if you don’t give a religion a head, then it doesn’t become a snake. The leader of Baldism is an idea, that idea’s name is Bald Jesus. He’s an idealized someone who always has your back, who wants you to succeed, and who doesn’t want to control you or what you do. Bald Jesus only wants to help you reveal what you already know: that you know the difference between being a dick and not being a dick and you can choose not to be a dick.
Bald Jesus helped me to reveal Baldism to the world. It was all there inside me just like it’s all there inside you. You don’t need intermediaries between yourself and the divine. You don’t need scholars to debate whether you are making a dick move or not. You know. Bald Jesus knows that you know.
In putting Baldism together, I didn’t feel like I was making conscious decisions, in many senses, I felt like an NPC (in video games, a non-player character) who was simply used to fulfill a function in the bigger game. It’s how Gershwin felt when he composed Rhapsody in Blue and how Einstein felt when he put together the Theory of Relativity. It was just there. Baldism and Bald Jesus always were.
It would have made much more economic and practical sense for my first NFT project to not be Bald Jesus, because it was clear from the beginning that the religious baggage and negative connotations it carried would make it difficult to succeed. The idea to create a bonifide religion around a funny NFT character who told people to make art and not be dicks was too ridiculous and yet here we are – a full fledged religion with holidays, a holy book, a small cadre of devotees, a currency of its own, and more.
In many ways it feels like the work did itself.
I’m writing this to affirm and point out that I’m just a dude. Sometimes I’m a dick. I try not to be. Honestly, I’m much less of a dick than I was before BJ. Bald Jesus and Baldism are a force that utilized me. Baldism is a living religion and I’m open to seeing where people take it. The only thing I want to ensure is that we don’t inadvertently or through some outside nefarious design turn it into a control system that goes against the one commandment.
The beautiful thing about Baldism and Bald Jesus is that they are free agents. They exist without existing. They are living without actually being alive. Bald Jesus is out there, roaming the world or the metaverse or both – real but not real. Baldism is out there (and in here) a liberating religious philosophy that is free to grow and change over time without having the burden of a central authority figure or all powerful figure head or boss.
There is no snake’s head that can be lopped off to destroy the snake. This snake has no head, in fact, it’s not a snake at all, it’s more of a donut. Go ahead world, take bite out of the donut, eat the whole donut, consume it all until it is nothing but the hole and there we have the holy of holies.
As we move forward, I hope that we can build real world and metaverse Baldist Temples. I hope many more people become involved in Baldism, $BALDS, and the entire ethos that we are collectively building, that the kind of decentralized leaders we need will step forward. Just as the first Council of Aiea stepped forward and completely reworked the OG version of the Holy Bjble – it is my hope that Baldism and the Baldist faith will grow and change over time, reflecting the values, ideals, and dreams of those who participate while embracing and sharing the one commandment without fail from start to finish. “Don’t be a dick”
You should know that there are different kinds of religious founders. There are those who feel called by a higher power, those who feel chosen by a higher power, and those who think they are a higher power.
History is littered with the bodies of those who followed those who declared themselves to be divine. From the Pharoahs to the Kings of Europe and Asia to cult leaders like David Koresh and Jim Jones. The men (it’s almost always men) who convinced themselves and others that they are God, are sociopaths. They are delusional and dangerous. Here’s a rule of thumb – if someone says they are God, put as much distance between yourself and them as possible because if death doesn’t follow them, destruction will.
Buddha, Jesus Christ, and the Prophet Mohammad never claimed to be divine. After their deaths their followers raised them to the status of gods in order to cement power and solidify control systems. Jesus of Nazareth said he was a child of God. That father, son, holy spirit thing was invented seven-hundred years later. Mohammad was careful in his lifetime to make sure that people understood he was chosen to deliver a message and that he was a man like any other and his actions were no more right or divine than those of any other man. A few hundred years after his death, those who followed his teachings put his actions and words together in another book – even though he had said that the one he revealed was the only one. For him, it was the book that needed to be referred to and anything else was simply the talk of people. Buddha, well – similar story, but there were many different Buddhas.
The danger of those who are seen as chosen by a higher power, usually comes after their death – at which point some narcicist deifies them and then by proxy deifies themself. Those who claim to be called by God are the innovators, the reformers, the revolutionaries, the missionaries, and in many cases – the folks who are actually doing their best to do good in the world. For all the ills that missionaries have wrought upon the world, I truly believe that the impetus that drives them comes from a place of good. Often, this leads to tragedy and inhuman suffering but sometimes it leads to a new way of being for millions of people. Yes, there are many tragic and terrible examples but there are also millions upon millions of people who have been led to a better life with improved medicine, sanitation, community empowerment, and other societal improvements.
As for me, I want to affirm again. I’m just a dude that put some stuff on paper and digital that already existed. That’s it.