Okay. I’ve got to admit it. Tourism is incredibly fucking boring. I’ve got some bitterness about it, because I don’t think it should be, but the fact of the matter is that it is. Why? Fucking baby boomers.
Here is what I think is wrong with the world. The most selfish generation ever born raped and pillaged their way to having everything, they had free love and they fucked it up with AIDS, they had socialist medicine and they’ve fucked it up with capitalism, they had beautiful parks and cool old towns and they’ve fucked them up with ‘quaint’ shops and restaurants.
They had everything and they fucked it all up. The worst part is that they are so selfish that they continue to fuck everything up with no intention of leaving anything good for the ones who follow them. They wear their khaki trousers with crisp lines down the front and their golf shirts and every time I see the typical 60-something American tourist, I just want to puke.
And now that they are all retiring, they are everywhere. You can’t visit a remote place without seeing these awful god damn grey-hairs who love golfing, buying expensive tasteless souvenirs, and paying for things that used to be free…not to mention charging for things that used to be free.
They’ll suck up social security, they won’t retire, they refuse to die, and like super cockroaches they fill up every interesting part of the globe. Why can’t they just die and leave the rest of us to clean up the mess they’ve already created in this world? Instead, they just keep on going like godzilla crossed with an energizer bunny…
Enough already. Take your RVs, your bank accounts, your Eddie Bower/J. Crew clothing, and your retirement and leave us already. I’m okay with people from all over the world, regardless of race, color, or creed, but these people….they disgust me. Bring on the euthanasia…start with the cruise ships, then hit the bed and breakfasts, then all the waterfront tourist towns and boutiquey places like Aspen, Victoria, Park City, Sedona, and Lahaina.
Don’t get me wrong, there are some fine people age 60-80, but most of them are doing something interesting at home, traveling to out of the way places without a noticeable budget or travel books, or living lives of abject poverty…
I don’t ever need to go anywhere where all those other 60-80 year olds are going. I don’t need to go to any mainstream tourist attractions, I don’t need to go to a town restored to look ‘cute’, I don’t need to go on a cruise, a package tour, a ‘destination’, or anyplace that sells mass produced t-shirts or refrigerator magnets…
I’m much more excited to see the Shag Harbor UFO museum, a run down diner, an industrial fishing pier, Silly’s Restaurant in Portland, or the Fairhaven Pharmacy Museum than anyplace people dress in period costumes, get on duck tours or double decker busses for tours, or serve ‘authentic’ anything that has to be listed as such.
Vago Damitio is the Editor in Chief of Vagobond.com and the CEO of Vagobond Travel Media. He is also a husband, father, writer, blogger, traveler, adventurer and teacher. He has spent his life mastering how to have incredible adventures on minuscule budgets. Someday he hopes to have the option of using gigantic budgets for miniscule adventures.
Vago's primary goal is to make Vagobond the best independent travel site on the web. So far, so good. 
